Somy Ali Opens Up About Domestic Abuse Survivors, Says ‘Fear and Hopelessness Are Powerful Chains’

Mumbai: Former actress and humanitarian Somy Ali, founder of No More Tears, has spent years helping survivors of domestic violence rebuild their lives. Through her work, she has witnessed the devastating impact of abuse in its many forms and continues to advocate for victims seeking safety, justice, and healing.

Speaking about the types of domestic abuse most commonly reported to her organization, Somy explained that abuse often extends far beyond physical violence.

“We see every kind, but the most common is a mix of physical violence and total control. Women are beaten, raped, financially destroyed, and told daily that they are worthless. Many are not allowed to leave the house, use a phone, or speak to their own families. The abuse is not always visible bruises. Sometimes it is the slow destruction of a woman’s mind until she believes she deserves what is happening to her,” she said.

According to Somy, one of the biggest misconceptions about abusive relationships is the belief that victims can simply walk away.

“Because leaving can mean death. Many women have been told for years that if they leave, their children will be taken or they will be killed. Some have no money, no documents, and nowhere safe to go. Others still hope the person they love will change. And many are so broken down that they no longer believe they are worth saving. Fear and hopelessness are powerful chains,” she shared.

Somy also highlighted the profound impact of emotional and psychological abuse, which she believes can leave deeper scars than physical violence.

“Physical abuse leaves marks on the body that can heal. Emotional abuse leaves marks on the soul that can last a lifetime. It makes a woman question her own memory and sanity. Many survivors tell me the constant insults, gaslighting, and threats hurt more than the fists. When someone you love tells you every day that you are nothing, you start to believe it. That kind of damage is harder to prove and harder to escape,” she explained.

When asked about warning signs families and communities should be aware of, Somy urged people to pay attention to changes in behavior and patterns of isolation.

“Watch for isolation. A woman who suddenly stops seeing friends and family. Watch for fear. Someone who seems nervous around their partner or makes excuses for injuries. Notice when someone’s personality changes, when they become quiet, apologetic, or start hiding bruises with long sleeves. These are not small things. They are signals that someone is in danger and needs help,” she said.

Discussing the role of technology in modern domestic abuse cases, Somy noted that digital tools have created new avenues for abusers to exert control while also providing survivors with new ways to seek help.

“Technology has made it easier for abusers to control and terrorize even from a distance. They track phones, install hidden cameras, and threaten to share private photos or videos online. Even after a woman leaves, the abuse can continue through messages and social media. At the same time, technology also helps us reach survivors who cannot speak openly. We use newer technologies and methods like AI online so women can ask for help without being caught,” she stated.

Sharing a story of survival and resilience, Somy recounted the experience of a woman who escaped years of manipulation and abuse.

“One woman came to us after years of being told she was crazy and that no one would believe her. Her husband controlled all the money and had convinced her family she was unstable. When she finally escaped with her children, he threatened to kill her. We helped her get protection, safe housing, and legal support. Today she has a job and her children are safe. She still jumps at loud noises, but she is learning to sleep through the night again. Healing takes time, but it is possible when someone finally believes you,” she revealed.

Somy concluded with a powerful message for anyone experiencing abuse or witnessing signs of it in others.

“If you or someone you love is in danger, please reach out. Do not wait. And if you see something that does not feel right, say something. We have a whistleblower and intake form on our website at www.nomoretearsusa.org. You can report what you see anonymously if needed. Silence protects abusers. Speaking up can save a life.”